Friday, February 7, 2014

David Says

From the mouth of a 4 (and a half) year old

David: Mom, dad is a kid!
Me: Am I a kid?
David: No. You're a parent.
Me: And how many kids live here?
David: 3 mom. You're the only parent.

Sounds about right.

David went shopping with me while I was on the hunt for new pants. After we left the 2nd store with no pants in hand...

David: Mom, you didn't get anything...again. You should just go to Walmart.

David: Mom, we should go to Chuck e Cheese.
Me: Why?
David: Because I've never been there. 
Me: Yes you have.
David: Oh, well the 'mercial says its fun for adults and kids. 
Me: What commercial.
David: You know, the one that plays after Super Why.

Thank you PBS for not advertising toys, but instead advertising a parents hell.

David: Mom, can I have some candy.
Me: We'll see.
David: Mom, that means no, doesn't it?

I didn't think he was supposed to figure that out for years.

David: Mom, will it ever stop snowing?

My thoughts exactly.

David: Mom, I have an idea. Do you know what we should do?
Me: What buddy?
David: Mom, remember when we were at the zoo and we rode the roller coaster? Remember I was scared, but I went and I liked it? Remember mom? And remember the day I wanted to go, but it was just us and Molley and you didn't want to leave Molley with a stranger.
Me: Yeah.
David: Mom, we should do that this winter. We should leave Molley with daddy and we should go ride the coaster.
Me: Bud, it's not open in the winter. It's too cold.
David: Oh (insert sad face)
Me: But maybe this summer we can go somewhere with lots of rides and a water park.
David: That would be fun mom! 

David: Mom, would you remember to pack my swim trunks?
Me: Yes
David: And my spider man swim shoes? Would you remember to pack those? 
Me: Yes buddy.
David: Mom, I think they are too small!! Mom, I need new ones! Mom, I think I should sell my small ones to Jackson.
Me: Okay, we can do that.
David: And we can buy new ones from someones porch. 
Me: laughing Sure buddy.
David: Good, 'cuz I need new ones.

Kid might have picked up on my Facebook Market Place buying and selling...

David: How many more sleeps until I'm 5 mom?
Me: Um, I'm not sure..a lot?
David: It's just taking too long, mom!
Me: I don't think so. You will be 5 soon enough.
David: Well, once I turn 5, how many sleeps until August?
Me: Not too many. Why do you want to know that?
David: Because that is when I start Kindergarten.  

This kid has been ready for Kindergarten for 2yrs now. His mom, not so much.


David to his teacher after he had to pull his card to yellow.

David: Miss Lori, we have a big problem here! There are just too many people who want to play with me, and I get in trouble with those boys. You need to keep them away from me. 
Miss Lori: David, aren't you in control of who you play with?
David: Yes, but I can't say no, so you will have to for me.

Takes after his mother and grandfather...


David: Mom, you know when you used to call me your baby. 
Me: Yeah.
David: And I didn't like it. You know, when I was 3.
Me: Yeah
David: I think I like it now. Mom, will you call me your baby again.

Always my baby boy, always.